We are a lot more than we think.
At our core, we are thoughts, emotions, words, and actions.

And whether we like it or not, consciously or unconsciously, all of these elements are aligned.

It all starts with having an opinion. We see something, and a thought arises. It could be as simple as seeing a tree and identifying it as such because it matches our definition of a tree. At this stage, we are already judging the situation or person, placing it into categories we know.

So, it begins with us thinking about something.

Next, we associate an emotion with that thought. For instance, if I like trees, I’ll feel happy seeing one. Or, if I worry about the climate, I might feel sad at the thought that soon there might be fewer trees.

From there, we express something about it, and our words reflect what we think and feel.
For example, if I like trees, I might say something nice about the beautiful tree I see. On the other hand, if I’m worried, I might comment that we should appreciate this tree now because soon there might not be any left.

Finally, we act. Continuing the tree example, seeing a tree might bring a smile to my face. Or I might go hug the tree, thinking I should enjoy it while I can.

This entire chain of events—thoughts to emotions to words to actions—often happens unconsciously.
We don’t realize how much we’re driven by our beliefs. Our beliefs sit at the beginning of this chain and shape everything that follows.

If I want to break this chain when it doesn’t serve me, the first step to change is awareness.

Whenever I catch myself saying or doing something that doesn’t serve me well, I need to stop and recognize it. Acknowledge what’s happening and work on changing it by addressing my beliefs. After all, it’s my beliefs that shape my emotions, words, and actions. It’s all connected.

Let’s take an example:
I find myself thinking that people are very negative these days, and I complain about it all day long. Ironically, I’m now part of the negativity I dislike. Since I judge negative people as annoying, I’m not very proud of myself either!

To change my belief, I need to question it deeply, peeling back the layers until I reach its root cause.
For example:
Why are negative people annoying? Because they complain all the time.
Why do they complain all the time? Because they don’t get what they want.
Why don’t they get what they want? Because they don’t ask for it.
And so on, until I reach the bottom of the belief.
Often, the root belief I uncover has little to do with the initial situation, and that’s OK. What matters is reaching the final answer—when there are no more questions to ask.

Once I’ve identified the root belief, I need to reframe it into its positive opposite.
In this example, the new belief could be: “People get what they want when they ask for it.”

When I establish this new belief, I will feel a weight lifted off my shoulders. That’s the sign I’ve successfully planted a new belief.
I might need to remind myself of this belief a few times since I’ve carried the old one for years. It may not disappear overnight, but I’m on the right path. And as evidence, I will begin to notice that my words, emotions, and actions shift naturally to align with my new thought.