Connecting to myself
Tips
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THE PUZZLE TIPS
CONNECTING TO MYSELF
How to use the puzzle tips ?
MYSELF
EGO
PRESENT
CONNECT
FILTER
COMPASS
PROTECTION
POLLUTION
RULES
MASTER
The Puzzle is a modular framework: use the tips you need, when you need it
Choose the Puzzle piece you want to focus on
Apply one tip associated to that Puzzle piece for 7 days in-a-row, and witness visible progress.
Science shows that it takes in total 3 weeks to settle a habit. The first 7 days to get used to it and ensure it suits you. The 2nd week will be challenging as this is when we fight and question a change. By the end of the 3rd week, you will crave to practice and the tip will be with you forever!
TIPS - Connecting to myself
CREATING MY SAFE BUBBLE
REMOVING PHYSICAL TENSIONS
ROUTINES FOR A STRONG BODY
My mind is often the primary reason I turn to Thee Puzzle.
I frequently find myself caught in negative thoughts that don’t help me. I dwell on the past, thinking about what I could have done better, or I project my challenges into the future, imagining one dark scenario after another. This is my Ego trying to protect me (cf. tips from the Puzzle piece "My Ego"), but it’s not helpful. Constantly thinking about what I should have done or should avoid becomes overwhelming.
Sometimes, I need to relax my mind and create mental space. I want to gift myself the luxury of pausing my thoughts and enjoying a moment of calm.
To achieve this, I need to address my immediate needs and pause my mind in the moment.
When my thoughts spiral endlessly, it feels like I’m suffocating. My challenges seem to consume all the oxygen around me, leaving no room to breathe. It’s as if I’m trapped, pressed up against a wall, with no space to move. Right now, I need to regain some level of freedom.
I need to create a bubble of space. It is a simple yet effective habit to break stress in the moment.
It starts with acknowledging that I’m doing this to myself, right then.
Next, I shall find a quiet place where I can be alone.
Standing there, I’ll stretch my arms out to the sides at shoulder height, reaching as far as I can. This physical act defines the size of my bubble—the space I want to create for myself.
As I do this, I will close my eyes and breathe.
My breathing doesn’t need to change rhythm, but I will make sure I inhale and exhale deeply. I inhale through my nose and exhale through my mouth, counting up to 3 as I breathe in, and up to 3 as I breathe out.
I imagine that with every breath, I am filling my bubble with air, like inflating a balloon. The more air I breathe into it, the more oxygen I give myself and the more space I create. I’ll keep my arms up as I breathe, lowering them once my bubble is fully inflated.
After lowering my arms, I’ll take a moment to visualize myself in the center of my bubble. This bubble moves with me and surrounds me wherever I go. It’s my personal safe space, and it is an extension of me.
I shall also decide on the color of my bubble. Like a balloon, its outer color defines how it looks inside.
I shall imagine light passing through the walls of my bubble, reinforcing with warmth my color. This light strengthens me, making me feel safe and peaceful.
Inside my bubble, nothing can harm me. It’s warm, cozy, and come.
I will stay within this bubble as long as I need before stepping back into my day.
Whenever needed, I can create my bubble by repeating the steps above. The more I practice, the easier and faster it will be to bring up my bubble when I need it. Over time, it will become an automatic resource to help me regain calm and balance.
When I am stressed, it often translates into tension in my body. My emotions and my body are tightly connected, so it is normal for them to communicate with one another.
This tip is effective for removing tension points in my body—provided there is no injury that requires medical assistance.
The objective is to focus on these tension points and release what is holding my muscles tense. By doing so, I can enjoy a relaxed body—a sensation that will then positively feed my emotions.
For this tip to work, I need to identify two tension points in my body. One is not enough to work. I can also have more than two, but I will focus on two at a time.
To begin, I shall make myself comfortable and close my eyes, to focus on my body and avoid distractions.
As I settle in, my Ego may raise objections, such as, “This is not a good idea,” “I could make the tension worse,” or “What am I thinking? Am I sure this will work?” This is a normal reaction. My Ego clings to the known—the discomfort I already feel—because the unknown feels uncertain. I shall let these thoughts pass and concentrate on the tip.
When I close my eyes, I first want to identify the two tension points I want to work on. Are they in my neck, shoulders, legs, stomach? I’ll scan my body thoroughly and select two points.
The goal is to focus on these tension points until they are gone.
I will feel the tension lift or “pop” as it releases. Until then, I will keep my attention fully on them. I can choose to stay with one point until it’s released, then move to the next, or switch back and forth. Either way, I’ll focus on the sensations in these specific areas.
As I focus on it, the tensions will grow, and my Ego may start to panic. It will fear that this uncomfortable feeling is getting worse and that I will be stuck with it. My Ego will tell me I am making a mistake.
I can trust that this is not it. What will happen is that the tension will intensify before it disappears. This may be uncomfortable, but it’s worth it because the tension will go —100% guaranteed. It gets worse before it gets better, so I shall prepare myself for it.
And be reassured: this process never takes more than 2 minutes for the 2 tension points to be gone. In most cases, it takes even less.
I shall focus on the tension until it’s fully gone. I’ll ignore my Ego and focus on my body, trusting that my senses know what to do. There’s no need to overthink for this to work.
This tip does require courage, as physical discomfort is something we naturally avoid. The immediate instinct is to get out of it—and that is the point here. To release the tension, I will need to go through a brief moment of heightened discomfort. It is a small price to pay to end up with a relaxed body, and such a rewarding moment when I feel that the tension is leaving me. In that moment, I will very proud before I did not give up and carried through my intents, and so relieved as being in my body feels good again.
When it comes to my body, the idea is straightforward: view it as a car.
For a car to go far, I need to put fuel in it—and similarly, the food I give my body translates into the energy that carries me throughout the day. Not eating well is like putting water in a car tank: it feels and looks full, but I won’t go far.
And for the car to last, I need to bring it in for maintenance. My car then comes back as good as new.
Similarly, the care I provide for my body—such as intellectual stimulation for my brain, exercise, or massages—keeps it functioning well.
So it boils down to two questions:
1. What do I feed my body with?
2. How do I maintain my body?
The benefits are twofold: I’ll feel stronger and more energized every day, and I’ll age better.
Both the short term and the long term are linked when it comes to my body: how I age is the consequence of how I act today, and how I act today directly impacts my energy levels throughout the day.
To start feeding and maintaining my body better, let’s refer to science.
Below are a few good principles to keep in mind and apply concretely.
And to be clear: none of this is meant to make me feel guilty.
Rather, it is about making me aware so I can make my own choices. Also, we are all human: sometimes, I will eat the “wrong” thing, and that’s OK too—provided I am not excessive with it.
1. Sugar creates addiction—that is precisely why I find it in most manufactured foods. It keeps me coming back for more.
Be mindful of this ingredient: science shows that sugar activates my brain in a way that triggers cravings for more. Specifically, sugar causes a rapid release of dopamine, a neurotransmitter associated with pleasure and reward. This creates a cycle of craving sugar to sustain the pleasurable effect, much like addictive substances.
The effect is especially visible in kids, who can have mood swings or find it hard to stop eating sweets. As adults, we may feel more in control, but the signs are still there.
Sugar is king at fooling me: it feels like I love it, but my body—including my brain as an organ—does not. The more I eat sugar, the more prone I become to illnesses over time, such as obesity or diabetes.
Interestingly, everyone who tries reducing sugar notices the difference over time: as I cut back, I’ll start tasting how sweet things actually taste. What I once enjoyed now feels too sweet! Reducing sugar is a game-changer, as I will experience it myself.
2. Cooking for myself is always better. If my schedule doesn’t allow it, even a few times a week is good. I could also cook in the evening for the next day, or batch-cook and freeze meals for busy times.
Cooking has many benefits:
I know exactly what ingredients I’m using and will typically avoid adding sugar, unlike store-bought foods.
I will value and enjoy my meals more because I’ve prepared them myself.
Cooking can be as enjoyable as doing crafts as a child. Looking up recipes and assembling ingredients can be a fun process.
It doesn’t have to take hours nor be complicated. Simple options include cutting raw vegetables for a salad, blending cooked veggies into a soup, or grilling good meat or fish with a green salad on the side.
Plus I tend to eat more vegetables when I cook, which is a healthy habit to cultivate.
3. A little of everything is a good habit. That is no science: that is common sense. Try to vary my diet so my body gets energy from different sources. This approach also allows me to enjoy anything I like, with moderation. For example, eating fries occasionally is fine, but having them daily is not!
4. Avoid gluten and proteins together to ease digestion. Overall, digestion uses about 10% of my body’s energy, but processing proteins can take up to 25% (look up “thermic effect of food (TEF)” for more information).The energy my body expends on digestion depends on both the quantity and type of food consumed.
When possible, avoid combining pasta with meat; instead, pair meat with vegetables. Gluten and protein are the most demanding to digest, so keeping them separate helps conserve energy for other activities.
5. Focus on fruits and vegetables as the main source of energy. The majority of what nourishes my body comes from these. The general recommendation for daily nutrition is that half of my plate at each meal should consist of fruits and vegetables. Rationale behind is that they provide essential nutrients like vitamins, minerals, antioxidants, and dietary fiber while being low in calories. Fruits and veggies reinforce my overall health, help prevent chronic diseases, and improve digestion.
Accordingly, when I shop at the supermarket, the fruits and vegetables section is where I should stop and buy the most.
6. Eat when my body is hungry, not when my brain wants comfort food. Meaning before eating, I should ask myself if my body is genuinely hungry or if it is my brain seeking comfort.
On the other hand, if I haven’t eaten recently, I should check if my body needs food. The key is to let my body, not my brain, lead the decision.
7. Drink water throughout the day. The easiest way to ensure I drink enough is to start the day with a full 1-liter bottle on my desk.
Human bodies are composed of 50–70% water, depending on age and gender. About 20–30% of daily water intake comes from food (if I eat enough fruits and vegetables). The rest must come from drinking. This means 1.5 liters daily for women and 2 liters for men - usually much more than we think to drink.
Dehydration affects my skin, organs, and overall health. For example, it can cause headaches, lack of concentration, kidney malfunction, increased stroke risk, and cramps.
So, I must ensure I drink enough water.
8. Do sports—or more broadly, move my body.
Beyond the immediate benefits to my health and mood, regular physical activity allows me to release pent-up energy and vent physically. Studies also show that people who engage in regular exercise tend to age well and longer.
Our bodies are not designed to remain seated all day: it’s important to give it a break by moving daily. This doesn’t have to be complicated—it could be as simple as stretching or taking a run around the block. It also doesn’t need to take long: 30 minutes of movement a day is sufficient. Accordingly, I should still take every opportunity to move. Small actions count, such as walking reasonable distances or choosing stairs over the elevator.
9. Treat myself. I need to make time to enjoy and care for my body by indulging in relaxing activities, for instance spending time in a hammam or sauna, getting massages, enjoying a haircut, or treating myself to a skincare session. It’s essential to appreciate my body—not just as a vehicle for achieving goals but as a source of pleasure and comfort. To come back to the car metaphor: in addition to commutes, why not enjoy the ride too?!
To state the obvious: as long as my body lasts, I’m alive! So, let's act as a good parent and take good care of it!
It is not about becoming overly controlling about my body. What matters is to be directionally correct with a balanced diet and some physical activities.
ROUTINES FOR A STRONG MIND
Some studies have been conducted on successful people to understand what contributed to their success.
And let’s be real: there are countless reasons why they succeeded, but none offers a full recipe to replicate. If there were, it would be widely known, and we would all be doing it already!
Still, one common trait among these individuals is willpower.
They are determined and focused, far beyond the average person.
This characteristic can be cultivated through routines, as highlighted in bestsellers like The 5 AM Club or The Miracle Morning. Feel free to read these books for complementary information about this tip.
The concept of a routine is to do the same thing at the same time, every day.
It differs from a checklist, where I do the same tasks daily but at any point during the day.
Establishing routines can be challenging at first, as my Ego might raise doubts or question why this change is necessary. And that’s okay: it is a caring response. My Ego doesn’t yet see the benefit, so why change? The simple answer is: because it’s good for me. My Ego ultimately wants the best for me, so let’s try it together!
We’ll assess later if it works. For now, it’s time to act, not overthink.
With routines, what matters is the regularity—both in the action and the timing.
By timing, this doesn’t mean a precise hour but rather a consistent sequence. For instance, as soon as I get up (regardless of the exact time, which may vary on weekends), I dress up and exercise.
Some recommend only morning routines, but we suggest doing what best suits my schedule. Rachel (our CEO), for instance, combines morning and evening routines, as they better fit her personal life.
Routines serve two purposes:
1. For morning routines, to get a head start for the day.
2. For evening routines, to end the day well before I go to sleep.
Routines must be precise to allow me to operate on autopilot. I don’t think: when I wake up, I do X. When I go to sleep, I do Y. I want to perform these actions automatically, without thinking about it. The objective is to introduce habits into my life that condition my mind.
For example:
- Take a cold shower in the morning with two objectives: to wake up fully and boost my energy for the day. This could be a full cold shower or simply ending a warm shower with cold water, as I prefer. (A side note: my mind might protest loudly when the time comes—don’t listen, don’t think. Just do it and enjoy the benefits!)
- Exercise in the morning to start the day full of energy. (It’s less recommended in the evening, as it may interfere with sleep.)
- Express gratitude for the day, acknowledging and valuing what I have while focusing on positive experiences.
- Drink a glass of water in the morning or evening to ensure I stay hydrated.
- Start breakfast with something healthy, being specific about what it is to establish a solid routine that nourishes my body.
This list is not exhaustive and should be adapted to my needs. Plus over time, my routines are likely to evolve as my life and my needs change. What suits me now might not serve me later, and that’s okay—grant myself the freedom to adjust.
With the above examples, there are two underlying components to replicate as I build my own routines:
1. Activities to calm me down.
2. Activities to build a warrior mindset, pushing me or gradually reprogramming my thought patterns.
As always, practice a routine consistently for 3 weeks without changing it. Science shows this is the time it takes to fully anchor a habit. Plus once established, I’ll notice when I skip a turn —and I will miss it!
Finally, remember this is not about superstition or adding stress: if I miss a day, the world won’t end. The goal is to build my resilience over time.
These habits are here to support my life. I won’t suddenly become a billionaire because I have routines. However, studies show that routines foster the mindset shared by all successful people.
CONGRATULATIONS!
MYSELF
EGO
PRESENT
CONNECT
FILTER
COMPASS
PROTECTION
POLLUTION
RULES
MASTER
YOU ARE MASTERING THE PUZZLE PIECE CONNECTING TO MYSELF!
WELL DONE!
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