The Puzzle piece THE UNIVERSAL RULE THAT GOVERNS MY LIFE
Practice book
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The puzzle tips
Practice book
INTRODUCTION TO THE PUZZLE PRACTICE BOOK
You’re reading these lines because you’ve decided to bring a Puzzle tip into your life—congratulations on taking this meaningful step!
The Practice Book serves as your guided companion to implement Thee Puzzle tips, supporting you step by step on your transformation journey toward living well. For each Puzzle tip, you’ll find practical guidance on how to apply it and tools to track your progress. Be ready to take notes as you move through the steps!
When introducing a new Puzzle tip, we recommend focusing on just one tip at a time for a minimum of seven consecutive days. Science suggests that building a habit takes about three weeks:
The first week helps you get familiar with the change.
The second week can be challenging as doubts and resistance often arise. This is when persistence is key—stick with it!
By the third week, the habit will feel natural, and you may even find yourself craving the practice. From this point on, the tip becomes part of you.
Once you’ve completed the program with one tip, move on to the next. There’s no pre-set order—focus on what feels right for you, when you need it most.
Enjoy the process of anchoring new habits into your life!
Live well.
SETTING THE SCENE TO LIVE WELL
How do you feel starting this practice book? On a scale 0 to 10.
How do you want to feel after applying Thee Puzzle in your life? On a scale 0 to 10.
Do I commit to myself to keep going until I reach my goal?
And when do I want to start?
You have chosen to focus on the tips of the Puzzle piece:
THE UNIVERSAL RULE THAT GOVERNS MY LIFE
Capture why I have chosen to transform the role "the Universal rules" plays
On a scale from 1 to 10, capture my perception how dysfunctional the Puzzle piece "the Universal Rules" is today
On a scale from 1 to 10, write down what success will look like after I have successfully practiced the tip for 7 days in-a-row
Science shows that it takes in total 3 weeks to settle a habit. The first 7 days to get used to it and ensure it suits you. The 2nd week will be challenging as this is when we fight and question a change. By the end of the 3rd week, you will crave to practice and the tip will be with you forever!
Today
Goal
Result
SETTING UP EXPECTATIONS
FOCUS
What this tip is about:
How to practice this tip?
This 7-day plan will help me become more aware of my thought patterns, take control of my attention, and consciously direct my focus toward positive beliefs that align with what I want in life.
Each day builds up on the last, reinforcing awareness and empowering me to create a mindset that uplifts and supports my aspirations.
Day 1: Recognize the pattern
The first step is to become aware of how my brain and my Ego operate.
Reflect on how my attention is drawn to what I believe in, which reinforces those beliefs.
Ask myself:
- What recurring worries dominate my thoughts?
- Do I tend to seek proof that these worries are valid?
- How often do I disregard evidence that contradicts my worries?
Action: Write down one dominant worry or belief that has been taking over my attention. Reflect on how I’ve unconsciously reinforced it.
Day 2: Observe without judgment
Today, the practice consists in staying aware of my thoughts and how my Ego tries to take control.
I’ll observe when a worry arises and notice how my brain looks for evidence to confirm it.
I won’t judge myself for these thoughts—I’ll simply note when it happens.
I’ll remind myself: I am not my Ego, rather the opposite: my Ego is me! I can choose what to focus on.
Action: Keep a small journal or use a note-taking app to record every time I notice my Ego leading me into a loop of worry.
Day 3: Take control of my focus
Now that I am more aware, I will consciously choose what I want to focus on.
Identify a positive topic I want to focus on (for example family or career growth).
Ask myself:
- Why does this topic matter? What will happen if I believe it can be?
- What do I want to believe about this topic?
- What evidence can I look for to support this belief?
Action: Write down my chosen topic and list 2–3 things I’ll consciously look for today to reinforce this positive belief.
Day 4 & 5: Seek proof for my new focus
Today and tomorrow, I will actively seek proof that aligns with my chosen focus.
If I’m focusing on family, I’ll notice children, parents, and signs of family life around me.
If I’m focusing on personal growth, I’ll look for examples of progress I’ve made or people around me growing and succeeding.
And I'll keep in mind that the same way my Ego sought proof for worries, I will leverage to seek proof for my positive beliefs.
Action: At the end of the day, write down the evidence I found that supports my chosen focus. Reflect on how it feels to notice this positivity.
Day 6: Reframe limiting beliefs
Today, I will come back on any limiting beliefs that arise as I practice this new focus.
I’ll pay attention on whether I still think focusing on myself is “selfish” or if doubts creep in about my new belief.
I’ll reframe these thoughts by asking:
- Is this belief rooted in fear or my Ego?
- Do I have a Cold Case standing in the way and that prevents me from implementing this tip in full (cf. My Filter tips)
- How does shifting my focus toward positivity benefit me and those around me?
Action: Write down one limiting belief I encountered and reframe it into a positive statement. For example:
- Limiting belief: “It’s selfish to focus on myself.”
- Reframed belief: “Taking care of myself allows me to show up better for others.”
Day 7: Reflect and solidify the practice
On the final day, I’ll reflect on the progress I’ve made and how it feels to consciously direct my focus.
As I notice progress, I will also ensure I keep this habit with me - and will practice it intensely for another 2 weeks, as science shows this is the time it takes to fully anchor a habit.
I’ll also identify
- What changes I've noticed in my thoughts and emotions over the past week
- How has focusing on positive beliefs impacted my mood and outlook?
- What challenges did I face, and how did I overcome them?
Action: Write down one key takeaway from this week and commit to continuing this practice for three more weeks to fully anchor it as a habit. By continuing to implement this tip, I am training my mind to focus on what uplifts and inspires me, rather than letting my Ego lead me into worry and doubt. This is a journey of awareness, choice, and growth—one step at a time.
Table of content
Focus
Do not try - decide
Design my future self
Reflecting back on this experience:
What worked well?
What will you change with the next Puzzle piece?
Be kind to yourself!
Habits come and go: what matters is to be directionally correct.
It is OK to come back to a Puzzle piece you have already tackled, or to take more time to anchor a habit.
Do as it suits you best.
DESIGN MY FUTURE SELF
What this tip is about:
How to practice this tip?
The objective of this tip is to become the person I aspire to be.
With Thee Puzzle, I aim to grow and transform into a stronger and better version of myself. I want to embody the traits and qualities that define the person I would love to become.
These changes can touch on any area of my life. For example, I may want to be more assertive at work—and in life overall. Perhaps I want to love myself more, feel at ease in social settings, or simply be happier. This tip is to help me move closer and closer to being "it"—whatever "it" may mean to me:
As a start, I should create a list of affirmations
This list must have a minimum of 33 items, each starting with "I."
I should avoid using verbs like "must," "have to," "want," or "need." Instead, I will focus on action or being verbs.
All affirmations must be positive (no negative phrasing) and written in the present tense.
For instance, I might write:"I am the best Mum for my child". Or "I radiate confidence and self-love". Or"I am at ease in any social environment."
With these statements, I should capture what feels out of reach
My affirmations should include the qualities and experiences I deeply desire but doubt I can achieve. If I struggle with finding a partner, for example, I might write affirmations about loving myself or being loved by others. If I dream of becoming a parent, I could include affirmations like:"I enjoy growing a baby inside me" or "I never give up on becoming a Mum."
The more uncomfortable an affirmation makes me feel, the more important it is to include it on my list. This discomfort highlights the limiting beliefs holding me back. My goal is not to reinforce what I already believe to be true, but to challenge the barriers preventing me from becoming the person I want to be. The more an affirmation resonates deeply or unsettles me, the more powerful it is.
Once I have my list, I should associate a gesture with each affirmation. Each statement should have a unique gesture associated with it.
Then, every morning, before I leave the house or start work, I will say all my affirmations out loud, paired with their gestures. If possible, I will even do them in front of a mirror to see me and hear myself.
I will speak with strength and conviction, as if I already believe in them.
At first, this practice will feel strange and artificial, especially because many items on the list will not yet feel true. That is the entire point. By repeating these affirmations daily, over time, I will start to trust they are valid and no longer awkward or unnatural.
As I say and mimic these affirmations day after day, my subconscious will start to accept them. This process creates a ripple effect: as I begin to trust these affirmations, I will unconsciously start to align my actions with them. My behavior will shift, and I’ll notice gradual changes in my life, moving in the direction I desire.
The key is to trust the process. Begin with daily affirmations and gestures, let them take root in my mind, and watch my actions and life transform over time. While I don’t know exactly when or how the changes will come, I can be confident that they are on their way. As I align my actions with my affirmations, I will attract the life I seek for.
Transforming into the person I want to be is a journey of many facettes. This step by step guided implementation aims at introducing daily affirmations in my life, to challenge my limiting beliefs, reframe my mindset, and attract more of the life I desire.
Step 1: Define My Objectives
To grow into the person I aspire to be, I should think about the areas of my life I want to improve or transform—whether it is for instance to become more assertive, learn to love myself, feel more confident in social settings, or cultivating happiness. Write down as much as I wish.
Step 2: Create my list of affirmations
Write at least 33 affirmations that describe the qualities, traits, or experiences I desire.
Each affirmation needs to follow these guidelines:
Begins with “I” - no "we", "you" or "they" to start my statements with
is written in the present tense - so no past nor future tense
Does not refer to a precise timing. For instance, I should not write that "I will find a new job in the next 6 months", but "I will find a new job". Rationale being that we want to be directionnally correct, but we are not in control of the clock.
Avoid using words like “must,” “have to,” “want,” or “need.” Instead, I focus on verbs of action or being.
Be all positive, avoiding negative phrasing.
Focus on areas where I experience self-doubt. My affirmations reflect qualities or goals I desire but currently doubt I can achieve. For instance, if finding a new job feels unattainable, I could write "I am excellent in interviews", "I make strong impressions", "I believe I deserve a job", etc.
Pay attention to affirmations that make me feel uncomfortable or uneasy. These are the ones that challenge my limiting beliefs. The more an affirmation stirs my emotions or feels out of reach, the more impactful it will be for me.
As an example, I could write 'I have eye to eye conversations' and 'I can talk to anyone" if I am shy and want to be more assertive.
This list shall not focus on one thing only.
On the contrary, I should cover in it all what I wish to happen. Also, for each item I can write or more statements - to cover all what I wish to become.
Step 3: Introduce gestures
For each affirmation, I should create a unique physical gesture. The intent behind the gesture is to strengthen the connection between the words and my body.
Step 4: Practice daily with conviction
Each morning, without exception, I shall
I stand in front of a mirror
I say each affirmation out loud with strengh and convinction, pairing it with its corresponding gesture
And to be transparent, I do not need to already believe these affirmations are true. All I need is to trust the process. My mind will be first to pick these affirmations up. Then I will surprise myself acting in a way which proves some of these affirmations right.
As I continue this daily practice, I will notice how my beliefs, actions, and life begin to shift. Trust that changes will unfold at their own pace. By following these steps with commitment and patience, I can initiate a chain of events which will lead to meaningful changes in my mindset and life, aligning myself with the future I desire.
Last, over time my aspirations will evolve. Revisit my affirmations at times, to ensure they remain close to my needs.
Science shows that it takes 3 weeks to fully anchor a habit. Keep practicing my affirmations each day - and most likely I will surprise myself do it each day, way beyond 3 weeks!
More challenges?
Introduce other tips into your life
Seeking for inspiration?
Go through Thoughts and People’s stories to find out how others have leverage the Puzzle to solve their challenge
WHAT NEXT?!
DO NOT TRY - DECIDE
What this tip is about:
How to practice this tip?
For the purpose of communication, we’ve created words that have no tangible reality. It makes total sense, as we need them to explain ourselves—yet the story changes when it comes to how our brain understands these words.
To illustrate this, let’s focus on the verb “to try.”
“Trying” is a concept that doesn’t exist in reality. It’s very useful for expressing ideas and intentions, but our brain struggles to process something that isn’t concrete.
Because our thinking can often be black and white, anything that doesn’t fit neatly into those categories tends to fall into the "at risk" zone. In our binary brain, if trying means both doing and not doing (since there’s no guarantee of success), it becomes a strange expression. Strange signals potential danger. Potential danger equals avoidance.
This is why, when we say we’ll “try” to do something, we are unconsciously less likely to achieve it. “Trying” implies hesitation, uncertainty, or even resistance.
Let’s use a simple example to illustrate this concept.
Imagine someone asks me to take a cup of tea. A normal cup of tea—no risks, nothing unusual about it.
Now, I answer instinctively, without overthinking: which of these two sentences feels more natural to me?
Grab this cup.
Try to grab this cup.
To be exhaustive, when we’ve worked with people who preferred the second sentence, it was often because they felt the first one sounded too bossy. They preferred a more polite, gentle phrasing.
Putting that angle aside, most people found that “try to grab this cup” felt odd. It made them wonder: Why should I try? Is there something wrong with the cup? Is it harder than I think? Is there a hidden trap I’m not seeing?
This simple example shows how our brains operate.
“Trying” implies that I might fail, that it might be difficult, or that success is uncertain. None of these thoughts create a positive impression.
To avoid this ambiguity, I need to avoid “trying.” Instead, I need to decide. I either take the cup or I don’t.
The same applies to life.
I can decide to use Thee Puzzle and transform how I live my life. Or I can try to change, keeping all my options open—ultimately most likely staying the same.
Deciding carries far more weight. It also requires courage because once I decide, there’s nowhere to hide. It means I’m doing it—no matter how difficult, scary, or painful. I’ll keep going until I succeed. This is my promise to myself: I won’t give up until this is done and behind me.
And when it is, trust us —we all wonder why it ever felt like such a big deal.
Our Ego is clever at creating resistance to change. Just like with “trying,” change feels uncertain because we don’t fully know who we’re becoming.
Once the decision is made, I need to keep going. On the other side of the puff of smoke my brain creates, it’s so worth it. This is how I grow and become better and bigger.
Words carry intentions, and intentions are powerful tools that shape our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.
It’s now up to me to decide to live a better life.
I already have all the resources I need within me. And with Thee Puzzle, I have the tools to organize those resources and make it happen.
This step-by-step plan will help me shift from "trying" to "deciding" as I approach change, reinforcing the mindset needed to create lasting transformation.
Over the course of 7 days, I will explore my commitment, address obstacles, and learn to fully embrace the power of decision-making.
Day 1: Understand the difference between “trying” and “deciding”
On this first day, I'll start with reflecting on the concept of “trying” and why it often leads to failure.
“Trying” implies doubt, difficulty, or potential failure. It unconsciously tells my brain that success is uncertain.
“Deciding,” on the other hand, tells my brain that I’ve made a commitment, and success is my focus.
Action:
Use this example: imagine someone says “Try grabbing this pen.”
How does that feel? Does it seem likely I’ll grab it, or does it feel like there’s something wrong with the cup?
Now imagine they say: “Grab this pen.”
Notice how much more confident and straightforward this sounds.
Reflection: Write down one area in my life where I’ve been “trying” instead of “deciding.” What difference would it make if I decided instead? And on a scale from 0 to 10, how scary does it feel to decide? How much resistance is my Ego building up against?!
Day 2: Assess my commitment
Transforming myself requires a full commitment, not a half-hearted attempt.
On a scale from 0 to 10, how committed am I to making this transformation?
The opposite of committing is remaining where I am. On a scale from 0 to 10, how ready am I to leave my current state behind?
Action:
if my answer is less than 10, then it is a “No”. Identify what is holding me back and write down any obstacles that make me hesitate.
And be truthful to myself: there is no way that I am just happy to change. There are always some resistance involved, in particular as we talk about something that matters to me. So do spend the time and dig: I need to identify why I would not do it, so I can address it.
Then be clear what is it that I am making a decision on. And be very clear in my description, as it can't be high level. For instance, my decision cannot be to become a stronger person. I need to pick what a strong person is: for instance, I decide that from now on I will be able to say no and stop people people when it costs me too much.
Write down this decision of mine, that I commit to gift myself with.
Day 3: Face obstacles standing in the way of my commitment
Let's focus on removing the barriers to my transformation.
One common barrier is fear of failure, often linked to feeling overwhelmed by the size of the goal.
Another one is to fear whom we will become. I may not be too happy right now, but at least I know who I am. What if I change too much and lose myself? Or what if I don't like the changes I made, once there?
There are all legitimate points.... cleverly raised by my Ego to keep me where I am.
So think about the goal: do I want to become that person?
The alternative is crystal clear: to remain where I am today? Is this what I want?
Transformation will happen step by step, at my own rhythm.
I shall on being directionally correct, not perfect. Progress is the goal, not immediate success.
Actions:
Identify how my resistance manifests. Do understand how my brain works on this matter, take an object weighting 2-3 kilos. Hold it with my 2 hands, arms straight at the level of my shoulders. Keep doing it until my shoulders burn and observe how my brain is handling the moment. What logical information am I feeding myself with to stop hold this object? What strategy does my Ego elaborates to make me stop?
This strategy not to do something is my main way of sabotaging myself. As an example of strategy, my brain may shift and focus my attention on doing something else (so I put the object down and do it!). For instance, I need to note down an item I forgot on the shopping list: put the object down and seek for a pen to add it.
Now that I have identified my pattern, I want to be conscious of it when it happens: write down from today and until the end of the week, each time I catch my Ego implementing this deflector program.
Whenever resistance comes, all of it is in my head (cf. "The Pollution in my head" puzzle piece). And so to counter it, I need to exit being in my head - and that means act. I shall face my fear and keep doing what I am doing a little bit more. One step at a time, yet each time resistance shows up, I take the action to move towards what I want.
Write down from today until the end of the week how strong this resistance feels from 0 to 10, and observe the trend. There is no right or wrong here: it could be steady, it could be all over the place depending on the day. What matters is that we keep going, day after day. Because I decided so.
Day 4: Commit to steady progress
Transformation doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a process of consistent effort and progress, and I am on my way to it. Remind myself that my commitment is to keep moving forward, no matter how small the steps.
Actions:
Write down three small steps I will take toward my goal this week. Make sure it is realistic, and commit to doing it.
Notice and capture how it feels right before, and after the facts.
Write down every single small and big win I make. Every step, every victory - brings me closer to my objective, and therefore is worth acknowledging. And for each of them, congratulate myself for doing it. Be proud of the work accomplished.
Day 5-6: Shift my language
Language shapes intentions, and intentions guide behavior.
From today onwards, each time I can (as sometimes "to try" is useful to carry a meaning!), I’ll replace “trying” with more decisive language such as
“I will.”
“I choose to.”
“I have decided to.”
Action:
Notice and count each time I use the word "trying" in a day.
Each time it is possible, rephrase it. For example, instead of “I’ll try to wake up early,” say “I’ve decided to wake up early tomorrow.”
Practice saying this to myself and others in a confident tone.
Day 7: Reflect and reinforce
On Day 7, I shall reflect on the changes I’ve experienced over the past week.
What difference has it made to shift from “trying” to “deciding”?
How has this mindset changed my actions or confidence?
What progress have I made so far?
Commit to continuing this practice for as long as it takes to reach your goal. Progress happens step by step—what matters is that I keep moving forward.
Keep in mind that this is a process we go through for every change: once I have achieved my objective, if I decide to implement a new one I can go through these steps again. Resistance does happen each time we transform: I am now better equipped to carry these changes through.
CONGRATULATIONS!
MYSELF
EGO
PRESENT
CONNECT
FILTER
COMPASS
PROTECTION
POLLUTION
RULES
MASTER
YOU ARE MASTERING THE TIPS RELATING TO THE PUZZLE PIECE "THE UNIVERSAL RULE THAT GOVERNS MY LIFE"!
WELL DONE!!