Build an entrepreneurial unbreakable mindset - People's stories
#2. I assumed losing customers would make me smaller
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People's story
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Deep dive
FAQ
Introduction - People's stories
All People's stories are written in the 1st person to reinforce their impact.
While anonymity is preserved, all stories are inspired by real facts.
People's stories are examples, to feed you with concrete cases of how THEe PUZZLE has been used. They are not to tell you what to think, or absolute truth: they were created with the intent to illustrate how you can transform your life with THEe PUZZLE.
Each People’s story is presented in the following way:
Part 1. The authentic life experience
Part 2. What that same moment could have been, leveraging THEe PUZZLE
Part 3. Decoding the story through the lens of THEe PUZZLE framework
Part 1 - I thought I had a new customer!
This morning I woke up feeling great! I happen to meet this lady during a coffee break at a conference, and she happens to work for a big corporate I would love to collaborate with. She told me she would be interested by my offer, so I followed up and she agreed to have a meeting. This was happening like in a dream: it suddenly felt so easy to be in touch. That customer felt so close, it was incredible!
And so we talked: while they were not interested with the full spectrum I could offer, they were still interested and wanted to start small to test what we could do together.
So we started by planning one workshop. It got postponed a few times, but still it was scheduled. And we delivered it, getting positive feedback from the group. More than 20 people were there, so the attendance was also a good sign of their interest.
Full of enthusiasm, I followed up: the agreement was that this was to be a first step of a long collaboration.
They confirmed they interest, and also that they had to get organized internally, and assess who would be best fitted to be part of our program.
And since then, despite my multiple attempts to move forward, nothing is happening. They do respond to me, but I am not able to get them to move. I have offered options, brainstorms, sent updated presentations.... nothing is coming back! This is so frustrating!! I don't know what I am doing wrong.
Maybe they did not like the workshop and did not dare telling me?
Maybe they have no budget?
Maybe they are no longer interested?
I am all these questions going on and on in my mind, and no answers to them. It would help me to understand what is getting in the way, and also as I approach other customers.... but I have no information so all I do is speculate!
This is also not easy to take because I was really counting on this additional income, plus I invested a lot of my time in this relationship. All in all, this silence and missed opportunity are pulling me down. I have a hard time moving on, and each time I talk to a new prospect I have this experience at the back of my mind. I don't know if I can capable to sell and run a company. This tends to prove the opposite, and I don't have other commercial wins to counterbalance the fact that I have not been successful to date.
When you open internet, it looks like things are meant to happen easily if you are in the right place. So many successful people have make it so fast, and without putting so much effort into it it seems.... So why is it not happening to me? Am I in the wrong place and wrong job?! Can I even ever be successful one day? Or is life telling me the opposite?
.....I am lost and not sure what I should do.
CONGRATULATIONS
MYSELF
EGO
PRESENT
CONNECT
FILTER
COMPASS
PROTECTION
POLLUTION
RULES
MASTER
You have gained perspective how others have overcome their challenge leveraging THEe PUZZLE!
May it inspire you.
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Part 2 - Winning customers do not define who I am
This morning I woke up feeling great! I happen to meet this lady during a coffee break at a conference, and she happens to work for a big corporate I would love to collaborate with. She told me she would be interested by my offer, so I followed up and she agreed to have a meeting. This was happening like in a dream: it suddenly felt so easy to be in touch. That customer felt so close, it was incredible!
And so we talked: while they were not interested with the full spectrum I could offer, they were still interested and wanted to start small to test what we could do together.
So we started by planning one workshop. It got postponed a few times, but still it was scheduled. And we delivered it, getting positive feedback from the group. More than 20 people were there, so the attendance was also a good sign of their interest.
Full of enthusiasm, I followed up: we did one workshop together, but soon they lost interest.
As you can imagine, I was very disappointed and starting to elaborate plenty of reasons in my head why they were not buying from me - none of them making me look good or feel well.
To stop the cycle, I decided to go from a walk - to leave my thoughts behind, and focus on my body. As I started walking, I concentrated on how I was physically feeling. I realized that I had plenty of tensions in my back or my knees, and started to stretch. As my body was more and more relaxed, I noticed that my mood too was going along. It also felt nice to take a break from the computer and all this thinking.
As I connected more and more with my body, my mind was still active so I decided to task my Ego to help! I asked it to help me focus on the present. To look out for all what was going on around me. Notice the temperature of the air, notice how nature looked around me, notice some magnificent colors, a flowers, hear the birds... Look for as much information as possible, happening all around me. And it worked! For a moment, I was completely out of the world: I was just enjoying fully my moment outside. Aware of my body and taking care of it, aware of my environment and anchored in it rather than far away in my thoughts.
This break was a complete game changer!
To my surprise, as I came back to the office lots of ideas came to mind. How I could reach out to other customers. How I would follow up with this one next. How I would not give up, as companies take forever to make decisions. I not only had ideas about how to handle this customer, I had ideas about how to generate others! I also realized that never ever would I give up on my product and my company. I would do what it takes to make it work!
Still, questions and doubts started to come back in the next coming days, so I decided to take a moment and go through them. It felt important to get to the bottom of it. I did put lots of hope into this one customer, but I also had other opportunities - so why would this one hit me so hard? What was I putting behind this event, for it to stick with me and shake my balance?
Why was this one contract important? Because it was the first one with a big corporate, and so it would have proven I could convince big companies to work with me.
Why this one? Because it is very difficult to enter these big corporate, and losing one means a lot of effort for nothing.
Was it for nothing? Was I sure I could not work with them again? No, they could come back....
But still, I felt really annoyed. I realized that deep down, I had this fear to fail. The fear that I would be without customers.
Did I really believe I could be without customers? No!
Why? Because I would keep trying until I would meet my customers!
Still, the fear to fail was still here. Smaller, but still here.
Why would winning this customer was so important? Because if you don't win customers, you don't earn money.
And why it is important to earn money? Because without money, you cannot provide your family.
And if you can't provide for your family, what happens? You are a failure and a disappointment.
Is that true? That people only consider and love you if you can provide them with a material life? No.
What is the opposite idea? That people love and consider you even when you can't provide a material life.
And that thought helped me a lot.
I would earn the money from customers, but I already had the love and consideration of my family and friends. And no matter how successful, that would remain.
All I had to concentrate on was to win customers: that thought helped me focus and keep on going.
Part 3 - Thee Puzzle decoder
Let's decode this People's story with the lens of Thee Puzzle pieces.
MYSELF
EGO
PRESENT
In this anecdote, the person has been heavily leveraging techniques to gain support from his/her Ego and be present. You could see how focusing on what is really happening around you, looking at your environment as a collection of information and without judging - helped a lot. That latter part is key: being present goes with accepting what is happening around me right here and right now, not having an opinion about it. It is not about deciding whether the forest looks beautiful today, it is about noticing how the forest looks today.
The same approach would apply in discussions with people while being fully present: I am not judging whether I like or agree with what the other persons says, I am receiving the information and playing it back.
The Ego was used to help focus. Keep in mind that if you let your Ego loose, it will find risks and problems for you to avoid. The idea is therefore to rather be precise in tasking it to help, looking for activities that will do you well. Because in its Ego word, finding issues and bringing them to me is caring and helpful.... while I may have a different view about that!! So the more precise I am in putting my Ego at my service, the better.
CONNECT
FILTER
Connecting with my body was an essential component of this journey. It allowed me to take a step back, and forget with a short period of time all these thoughts that were turning in my head. It also allowed me to realize that I was physically stressed! That my body was also translating physically the tensions I was creating in my head. Reconnecting with my body and making the time to stretch indirectly also helped by brain let go some of the pressure I was putting on myself.
With the Filter, I consciously decided to take some steps back from the situation, rather than remain being worried about it. I decided to stop and go for a walk. I decided to stop and question myself, as I was doubting. All this because I was aware I was not doing myself any good by thinking this way and remaining in this downward spiral of thoughts.
COMPASS
PROTECTION
POLLUTION
As I stood up to protect myself... from myself (!), I also decided that I did not want to continue feel that way: stressed, doubtful, worried. Instead, I wanted to feel determined and gain back energy to keep on going. Keep on looking for other customers, not give up - because this company matters to me! So behind the actions I took, was the idea to reposition my Compass on emotions that would fuel me and bring me there - rather than drain me.
The Pollution in my Head played also a major role in this story. By questioning myself and more and more, I was creating toxic loops of thoughts. And without any knowledge whether any of these scenario would be true, because I had no input whatsoever from this potential customer. So I could have spent days digging into what I went wrong, while they may think that everyone was fine and it just happens that they have no budget (ex). Being aware of when things are solely happening in my head versus it is reality - is critical to my mental health. Because in most cases, there is no materiality: I am letting my Ego take control and bring me to places which could happen but have not. Translating into me stressing now about hypothetical situations which may never happen!
RULES
MASTER
Though in this story it could have felt that all was in the hands of the customer, I also had a fair share! It is true that the final decision to purchase from me lies with my customer, and that all I can do is influence to the best of my abilities. But how I live the whole journey is up to me. I can be mad and frustrated - and most likely it will show in my interactions with them. Or I could do everything I can, and be relaxed about what they do with it; pursuing as many opportunities as I can in parallel. That part is entirely up to me, and the emotions that come with it.
Choosing also to believe it is possible. Deciding that I will not give up, and whether it is with this customer or another, with this exact product/service or another - I will make it. Because I will keep going until I find a way! And I can see that other entrepreneurs struggled too, because they made it. I am on the right path working on myself and building my unbreakable mind, as it will be the shadow of my success.