Protection

Life is a Puzzle. Master the Pieces. Live well.

The Puzzle piece THE PROTECTION IN MY HEAD

Practice book

Reminder

The Puzzle is a solution to deal with stress and uncertainty

The Puzzle material and certified services are solely sold on the Puzzle website, and cannot be purchased from any other source.

The Puzzle is a proprietary methodology, protected by Copyrights.

This Copy is personal and cannot be shared or sold.

The Puzzle exists in 3 formats: audio, PDF and online.

You own the audio and pdf files relating to the theme you have purchased
The Puzzle online is available upon subscription, with clickable access to the full Puzzle.

Look up on the right hand corner of the pdf document: the icons inform you which format is available for that particular piece of information.

The Puzzle is not suitable to overcome physical or psychological abuses, nor mental diseases. I urge you to liaise with professionals for support should you be in such a case.

1st Step

Discover

Explore the Puzzle framework

Puzzle framwork

Deep dive

FAQ

2nd Step

Choose

Witness how others have used the Puzzle and inspire yourself

People story

Thoughts

3rd Step

Apply

Pick one Puzzle piece
Apply the tip(s)
Follow up on results
Acknowledge positive impact
Repeat

The puzzle tips

Practice book

INTRODUCTION TO THE PUZZLE PRACTICE BOOK

The practice book is available to keep track of my thoughts, and support me step by step through my transformation to live well.

I will find here all the Puzzle tips, together with some help on how to apply these tips, and measure progress.

I can either print it and write on it, or use a side booklet of my own to take notes.

3 key advises to live well are:

Start small, and build up from there.
Experiment in place and/or with people I am comfortable with, then expand.
The more I practise, the more comfortable I am, and the easier it gets!

Have fun anchoring these new habits!

Live well.

SETTING THE SCENE TO LIVE WELL

How do you feel starting this practice book? On a scale 0 to 100.

How do you want to feel after applying the Puzzle in your life? On a scale 0 to 100.

Close my eyes and imagine being there.
Capture here with my own key words what it feels like - with some thoughts, feelings and sensations how it will be:

When do I want to be there?

And when do I want to start?!

I have chosen to focus on the tips of the Puzzle piece:

THE PROTECTION IN MY HEAD

Today

Goal

Result

SETTING UP EXPECTATIONS

TRIGGERING THE PROTECTION IN MY HEAD

What this tip is about:

How to practice this tip?

To leverage the Protection in my head, I need to set my limits upfront.

The principle of defining my safe zone is to create a bubble where I feel comfortable. And be clear what is unacceptable to me.

Then, each time someone crosses my red line, all I need to do is ask my Ego to fuel me, so I can react strongly. All it takes is to allow my Ego to be on fire each time a person flirts with my limits.

Still, limits are not dogmatic. They evolve with my life, suiting me at a given point in time. I could for instance now rebel against what I have accepted, or become tolerant with behaviors I did not allow in the past.

Life also teaches me what my limits are. I could for instance witness something and say nothing. Remain uncomfortable, and promise myself that next time I will not remain silent.

1. Starting with a quick survey, on a scale from 0 to 10:

On Day 1, how scary is the idea of stepping up for myself? ……………………………………….
On Day 1, how much at ease am I at setting up limits? ……………………………………….

2. To trigger the protection in my head:

I need to be clear towards myself what is acceptable, and what is not.

For instance, when someone is mad and shouts at me: is this acceptable? Or should I react equally strongly?

There are different answers to this question, depending for instance on how tired I am, or how shy I am, or who is shouting and where. Limits also evolve over time.

The key is not so much to be dogmatic, but rather to assess the context and decide how much I am willing to accept, at a given point of my life.

Write down here the list of events I no longer want to accept in my life:
On a scale from 0 to 100, how committed am I to protect myself from any event on this list?

If for instance I am 50% committed, it means that I will protect myself against one event out of two - hence if I pass with one, I must step up for the next!

When do I start?

3. When one element on this list happens, to protect myself, my reaction will be what feels right to me.

What I can give in the moment, to take good care of myself, and regardless of the other person.

I am also OK with the consequences of pushing back. This will trigger a reaction in the other person, and it will be what it will be - because it is worth protecting myself! Plus I could be surprised: as my reaction changes, maybe the other person will evolve too!

4. When I make the decision to protect myself, I should mobilise my Ego too.

Quickly ask it to come by my side and help me. Then go for it! Do not accept what is going on. Do not compromise. If I would not accept this for a friend, then why should I for myself?!

As I see fit, I can also explain: why is it not acceptable to me?

Note the word: “explain”.

I am not “justifying” myself. I do not need any other good reason than this situation making me uncomfortable, to react. Still, if I want, I can share my logic and why I am pushing back the way I do.

5. As I have protected myself for 7 days in-a-row, did I face any situation where I thought I was protecting myself, while in reality I was polluted?

As a reminder, the difference between polluting myself and protecting myself is that when I protect myself, the situation is real. It is not solely in my head. It is toxic to me, and it is happening for real.

Did toxic situations happen for real? Yes No
If yes, how often? ……………………..
And did I notice a positive trend, where this happened less and less during the 7 days-in-a-row experiment?
If not, what led me to misjudging the situation?
And what could I do to prevent it from happening again?
Also, did I face terrible reactions - as a consequence of me stepping up for myself? Reactions that I could not handle? Yes No
If yes, what did I learn and that will help me do differently next time (as there is no way I am giving up on protecting myself!)?

6. As I stepped up for myself, have the following feelings expanded in the 7 days in-a-row experiment?

I feel stronger Yes No
I have more courage than I thought, as it takes some to step up for yourself! Yes No
To my surprise, I was able to handle the conversation better than if I had kept quiet, while I assumed the contrary (that stepping up would only make things worse) Yes No
I am proud of stepping up for myself Yes No

If I have at least one “yes”, then I am in the right direction and should continue applying this tip in my life.

Coming back on the questions I answered on Day 1, on a scale from 1 to 10:

On Day 7, how scary is the idea of stepping up for myself? ……………………………………….

And how did my answer evolve compared to Day 1?

On Day 7, how much at ease am I at setting up limits? ……………………………………….

And how did my answer evolve compared to Day 1?

On a scale from 0 to 10, is it worth continuing to step up for myself?

Table of content

Triggering the Protection in my head

Next - intro

Previous - tips

Reflecting back on this experience:

What worked well?
What will you change with the next Puzzle piece?

Be kind to yourself!
Habits come and go: what matters is to be directionally correct.
It is OK to come back to a Puzzle piece you have already tackled, or to take more time to anchor a habit.
Do as it suits you best.